I consider myself to be cheerful, but not necessarily optimistic. In fact, I pride myself on maintaining a certain level of dissatisfaction that keeps me curious and in pursuit of any good I can do. So when I was recently asked how I maintain my apparent optimism amid the many frustrations of our organization, I acknowledged that I simply did not. Then I pointed to an interrobang I have drawn on my whiteboard and explained the Stockdale Paradox.
The little-known interrobang (‽) is a gem of a punctuation mark. It combines the question mark, also known as an interrogative mark, with an exclamation point, also known as a ‘bang’ in type-setter slang. It punctuates those statements that we have all said, but probably never thought about punctuating. “What‽” “You think that will work‽” “You put the LEGO where‽” Oakland's 99% Invisible did a fantastic podcast on the subject for those who are interested. These two seemingly inconsistent punctuation marks serve a third and powerful purpose when they are merged into a singly glyph. I enjoy the interrobang not only as a curiosity and conversation starter, but also as shorthand for another helpful inconsistency known as the Stockdale Paradox.
Admiral James Stockdale was a Prisoner of War for nearly eight years at the notorious Hanoi Hilton. As a senior officer in the camp he was an effective leader to his fellow prisoners and also a favorite target of their captor’s harshest punishments. When asked by author James Collins how he coped during that time, the stoic Stockdale brought up optimism – but not in the classic sense of the word. He first noted that truly optimistic prisoners, those who thought rescue was always near, often seemed to “die of a broken heart” after being repeatedly let down. His philosophy instead injected realism into optimism. As he told Collins, “You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end – which you can never afford to lose – with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.” Collins went on to describe this as the Stockdale Paradox and it has been popular in self-help and leadership circles ever since. Optimism and realism are merged to form a third and powerful purpose.
Back in my office, the interrobang on my white board helps keep me two important lessons from the Stockdale Paradox in mind. First and most importantly: #firstworldproblems. We are not Prisoners of War or one of the billions of humans whose daily lives see far more struggle and frustration than anything most organizations can throw at us. If optimism is temporarily out of reach, certainly we can muster gratitude that our current realities are not that bad.
Second, the interrobang and Stockdale's words are a reminder that simply wishing and thinking and being optimistic never caused any situation improve. The reason individuals, organizations, or societies will prevail in the end is because each day there are people who will endeavor to face dissatisfying current realities and do something about them. And when frustrations seem insurmountable, feel free to yell “seriously‽” and then get back to work. ~
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